Build one datatable out of two with certain conditions

You could replace the merge() call with a custom method, which does the merging and filtering at the same time. See the example below. I think this is a better approach than first merging (introducing duplicate rows in the result table) and then filtering (i.e. removing the duplicate rows).

Here, it is assumed that the parameters all have the same format. The tTemp table is used as a temporary storage for the contents of table t2 but with the extra column. This allows importing the rows in the result table.

Maybe there is a more elegant solution, but this should work as intended. Please note that I have left out your additional requirement regarding the allowed values for NRO, which I am sure you can add easily.

static void merge_it(DataTable t1, DataTable t2, DataTable tResult, DataTable tTemp)
    {
        tResult.Merge(t1);
        tResult.Columns.Add("NRO1", typeof(int));

        tTemp.Merge(t2);
        tTemp.Columns.Add("NRO1", typeof(int));

        foreach (DataRow row in tTemp.Rows)
        {
            string name1 = row.Field<string>("NAME");
            string name2 = row.Field<string>("NAMEA");
            DataRow[] matches = tResult.Select($"NAME = '{name1}' AND NAMEA = '{name2}'");
            if (matches.Length > 0)
            {
                matches[0].SetField<int>("NRO1", row.Field<int>("NRO"));
            }
            else
            {
                tResult.ImportRow(row);
            }
        }

        foreach (DataRow row in tResult.Rows)
        {
            if (row["NRO1"] == DBNull.Value)
            {
                row["NRO1"] = 0;
            }
        }
    }

you can keep same column name in both table if they denote same type of entity then see this code

 private static void DemonstrateMergeTable()
{
    DataTable table1 = new DataTable("Items");

    // Add columns
    DataColumn idColumn = new DataColumn("id", typeof(System.Int32));
    DataColumn itemColumn = new DataColumn("item", typeof(System.Int32));
    table1.Columns.Add(idColumn);
    table1.Columns.Add(itemColumn);

    // Set the primary key column.
    table1.PrimaryKey = new DataColumn[] { idColumn };

    // Add RowChanged event handler for the table.
    table1.RowChanged += new 
        System.Data.DataRowChangeEventHandler(Row_Changed);

    // Add ten rows.
    DataRow row;
    for (int i = 0; i <= 9; i++)
    {
        row = table1.NewRow();
        row["id"] = i;
        row["item"] = i;
        table1.Rows.Add(row);
    }

    // Accept changes.
    table1.AcceptChanges();
    PrintValues(table1, "Original values");

    // Create a second DataTable identical to the first.
    DataTable table2 = table1.Clone();

    // Add column to the second column, so that the 
    // schemas no longer match.
    table2.Columns.Add("newColumn", typeof(System.String));

    // Add three rows. Note that the id column can't be the 
    // same as existing rows in the original table.
    row = table2.NewRow();
    row["id"] = 14;
    row["item"] = 774;
    row["newColumn"] = "new column 1";
    table2.Rows.Add(row);

    row = table2.NewRow();
    row["id"] = 12;
    row["item"] = 555;
    row["newColumn"] = "new column 2";
    table2.Rows.Add(row);

    row = table2.NewRow();
    row["id"] = 13;
    row["item"] = 665;
    row["newColumn"] = "new column 3";
    table2.Rows.Add(row);

    // Merge table2 into the table1.
    Console.WriteLine("Merging");
    table1.Merge(table2, false, MissingSchemaAction.Add);
    PrintValues(table1, "Merged With table1, schema added");
}

private static void Row_Changed(object sender, 
    DataRowChangeEventArgs e)
{
    Console.WriteLine("Row changed {0}\t{1}", e.Action, 
        e.Row.ItemArray[0]);
}

private static void PrintValues(DataTable table, string label)
{
    // Display the values in the supplied DataTable:
    Console.WriteLine(label);
    foreach (DataRow row in table.Rows)
    {
        foreach (DataColumn col in table.Columns)
        {
            Console.Write("\t " + row[col].ToString());
        }
        Console.WriteLine();
    }
}

Try this:

1. Include NRO1 field in both queries for Table1 and Table2

2. Set default value 0 of NRO1 for Table1 (modify queryStringSE)

   e.g.:SELECT NRO,0 AS NRO1, NAME,NAMEA,NAMEB, ... FROM TABLE1

3. Set default value 0 of NRO for Table2 (modify queryStringFI)

   e.g.:SELECT 0 AS NRO,NRO AS NRO1,NAME,NAMEA,NAMEB,...... FROM TABLE2

Table1 will look like:

NRO  NRO1   NAME   NAMEA   NAMEB   ADDRESS   POSTA   POSTN   POSTADR   COMPANYN   COUNTRY   ID  ACTIVE
123   0     Fiat   Punto   500     J5        K4      O3      P4        O2         JT        1   1
133   0     Opel   Meriva  FTG     J5        K4      O3      P4        O2         JO        3   1

Table2 will look like:

NRO  NRO1   NAME   NAMEA   NAMEB   ADDRESS   POSTA   POSTN   POSTADR   COMPANYN   COUNTRY   ID  ACTIVE
0    423    Fiat   Punto   500     J5        K4      O3      P4        O2         JT        1   1
0    463    BMW    E64     SE0     JR        KE      OT      PG        OL         J8        9   1

4. Merge tables as you are already doing

Add following lines of code:

var carGroups = dataTable.AsEnumerable().GroupBy(row => new 
{
   Name = row.Field<string>("Name"),
   NameA = row.Field<string>("NAMEA"),
   NameB = row.Field<string>("NAMEB")
   //Other fields.....
});

DataTable result = dataTable.Clone();

foreach(var grp in carGroups)            
    result.Rows.Add(grp.Sum(r1 => r1.Field<int>("NRO")), grp.Sum(r2 => r2.Field<int>("NRO1")), grp.Key.Name, grp.Key.NameA, grp.Key.NameB);              

5. Check DataTable "result" for desired values